Wednesday, 30 July 2014
What Guys Really Want Girls to Know
Dear Girls,
Have you ever wondered what the guys you hang out with are really thinking and feeling? Has your boyfriend ever completely shut down on you, leaving you wondering why a totally minor incident ticked him off so much? Do you ever find yourself wishing that the cute but un talkative guy in class would open up a bit more?
Would it matter if you understood the unique way guys are wired?
In For Young Women Only: What You Need to Know About How Guys Think
, Shaunti Feldhahn surveyed and interviewed 400
guys between the ages of fifteen and twenty. The result of her research helps
girls understand what guys really think.
, Shaunti Feldhahn surveyed and interviewed 400
guys between the ages of fifteen and twenty. The result of her research helps
girls understand what guys really think.
In the end of the surveyed, she gave the guys a blank space and asked
an open-ended question:
Imagine that there is an auditorium full of teenage girls, including your little sister, and you have been asked to give these girls your advice about moving forward in a world of guys. You are behind a curtain, so you’re totally anonymous. What’s your best heart-to-heart advice for them?
The
top thing the guys want to tell girls can be summarized in a sentence: Be yourself, because you are more valuable
than you think.
In
a world that is so connected, girls tend to underestimate themselves. Girls compare
their appearance with supermodels. Girls try to mimic other personalities and
belittle their own. This lack of confidence in girls make guys get frustrated.
Therefore,
girls, these are advice from most of the guys around you.
- “Be who you are and do what you think is right, not what others want you to do,”
- “Be yourself and don’t feel like you have to act like everyone else.”
- “Be yourself! Don’t act different to get us to like you.”
- “Be yourself. Don’t try to mold yourself into the image society creates. That way, when you find that perfect guy you’ll know he likes you for who you really are.”
- “Don’t be afraid to be yourself. If they don’t like you for you, then they aren’t worth your time. Have fun together but don’t forget about your friends, because the guys will come and go but your friends will always be there in the end.”
- “Give guys a chance. We are just as inexperienced as you. And don’t act like someone you’re not to impress us. If you don’t feel comfortable with having a sexual relationship, then tell us. Most of us would be okay with that—and if we aren’t then you don’t need to be involved with us anyway.”
- “Have respect for yourself.”
- “If you respect yourself, for the most part guys should respect you.”
- “Just be confident and be yourself, and guys will like you.”
- “Just be yourself! You don’t have to change yourself to get guys. The guys are the ones that should change for a girl … we should be glad you girls exist.
- “Never compromise your principles.”
- “Never give up, and don’t let people say you can’t do something just because you’re a girl and that’s supposedly a man’s job.”
- “Never lose sight of who you truly are and what your own hopes and dreams are.”
Many girls think guys are attracted only to those who are “pretty and
slim,” but every girl deserves and can be attractive if she is confident. One guy gave this advice for girls.
Honestly, I would teach girls to be confident. Girls are still brought up seeing tall lanky supermodels being called beautiful, and they believe that if they don’t look the same way they’re ugly. Women need to be more confident, whether that is confidence in their appearance or even in their ability to talk to a guy. A girl who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to show it is the most appealing girl of all.
For Young Women Only: What You Need to Know About How Guys Think gives insight for girls to be confident in front
of guys, and also to attract them too.
gives insight for girls to be confident in front
of guys, and also to attract them too. 
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